Here's one I prepared earlier

I'm working this weekend in order to get on top of the to-do pile in preparation of HecticMonday and TerribleTuesday ahead of DeadlineWednesday. So I didn't think I'd get time to make waffles, until yesterday afternoon, which went like this:

Twitter: Hey, Sus, look at all these people discussing #waffles and making waffle plans!
Sus: Dude, I'm working. Stop distracting me.
Twitter: Ooooh, look, D and J are eating #waffles in San Francisco! Awww, how sweet!
Sus: I said... *blink* You know what, fine. FINE.

So I unpacked the brand new waffle iron and read the instructions. (That's right, boys. Always read the instructions. All of them.)










Look at this beautiful thing.


In the absence of a recipe collection, I decided to make the really easy-looking recipe for "Traditional Waffles" that came with the iron. This was a mistake.

I will post the recipe here as A WARNING FOR FUTURE GENERATIONS of waffle makers. Don't try this at home, kids. These are awful.

Ahem.

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Traditional Waffles according to Andrew James, Artisinal Kitchen Implements
3 free range eggs
170ml semi-skimmed milk
230g self raising flour
30g sugar [Ed.: This should've been a dead give-away. That's nowhere near enough sugar.]
100g butter

Melt the butter and allow to cool slightly. Whisk 3 eggs, add melted butter, sugar and milk. Carefully fold in the flour. Cook for around 4-5 minutes.

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So, I made the batter, I poured, I cooked, and I achieved waffles. YAY! They totally looked the part, too.

Don't be fooled. These only looked like #waffles to give you a false sense of security. They tasted of nothing and stale bread. They were also very tough (maybe that was my fault for using regular flour) and they certainly weren't at all sweet. Maybe folks who aren't German don't take "traditional" to mean "sweet enough that you don't need extra sugar" but I do, and these were just gross.

In summary:

Simplicity of recipe: 10 out of 10. Doesn't get any easier, does it? OR DOES IT?
Sweet or savory: Neither. Just plain bland.
Texture: That of old bread.
Taste: Nothing with a hint of stale bread.

Let this be a warning. Don't make these. Anyway!

Next week: I don't know yet, but I have 12 recipes already, whooooo! So we'll be making something tasty. Excelsior! Have a great Sunday, everyone.